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A QUICK SPELLING TEST
The
teacher told her class the word of the day was "dictate" and asked
who could spell it.
George raised his hand and he spelled out, "d-i-k-t-a-t-e."
The teacher said, "sorry that's wrong" Then she asked Stephen.
Stephen slowly spelled out, "d-i-c-k-t-a-t-e."
"Sorry" says the teacher, "that's not right either."
Next, she asked Fiona After a slight pause Fiona began spelling,
"d-i-c-t-a-t-e."
"Very good Fiona," applauded the teacher, "that's correct. Now,"
the teacher continued, "who can use this word in a sentence?"
Stephen raised his hand quick as a flash shouting, "I know-Iknow,"
"OK" replied the teacher, "please use the word Stephen."
Stephen responded, "How did my dictate last night, Fiona?"
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FUN! FUN! FUN!
A
teacher said to her little student Suzy, "Punctuate the following
sentence: Fun fun fun worry worry worry."
Little Suzy thought for a moment and began her reply, "Let's
see... Fun period ... fun period ... fun no period ... worry worry
worry!" |
A SMALL MISUNDERSTANDING
In a
primary school classroom, the teacher notices a little puddle
underneath Mary's chair.
"Oh Mary!" says the teacher, "you should have put your hand up."
"I did," Mary replied. "But it still trickled through my fingers." |
ANY IDIOTS IN THE ROOM?
"If
there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up" said
the sarcastic lecturer.
After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet. "Now then
mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?" enquired the
lecturer with a sneer.
"Well, actually I don't," said the student, "but I hate to see you
standing up there all by yourself." |
THE ATTRACTIVE UNDER GRADUATE
One
day, a very attractive under graduate visited the professor's
office. The under graduate pulled the chair closer to the
professor, smiled at him shyly, bumped his knee "accidentally",
etc.
Finally, the undergraduate said, "Professor, I really need to pass
your course. It is extremely important to me. It is so important
that I'll do anything you suggest."
The professor, somewhat taken aback by this attention, replied,
"Anything?"
To which the undergradute cooed, "Yes, anything you say."
After some brief reflection, the professor asked, "What are you
doing tomorrow afternoon at 3:30?"
The student lied, "Oh, nothing at all, sir. I can be free then."
The professor then advised, "Excellent! Professor Palmer is
holding a help session for his students. Why don't you attend
that." |
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